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Posted by HockeyGod Promoted 193 days 6 hours ago 5925 views
editorial
Entertainment / Gaming Entertainment
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55 comments
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Every time I want to get up and leave there's always one more quest to do, or one more guild member to help. I've been totally consumed by the game. I dream about upgrading leather armor or finding that elusive savory deviate delight recipe.
The following is a true story that was emailed to me. The names and faces have been changes to protect the pathetic.
Hi. My name is Xeido. I'm a light purple skinned, green haired, level 70 night elf druid. Strike that. My real name is Michael and I'm a 26 year old software engineer from Detroit - but lately I've been spending a lot more time as Xeido.
If you haven't guessed you, Xeido is my World of Warcraft character. We call it WoW for short. Xeido is a fully spec'd out feral druid who "pwns teh battelgrounds! Michael, on the other hand, is a WoW addict.
I never thought it would happen to me, but it did. 45 days ago I thought WoW was stupid. I made fun of everybody who played it. I told them I'd rather go out and play softball or beer pong instead. I had no idea what a Druid or a Rogue was, but now I can spend hours debating which one is better and why.
I didn't think I was this type of person though - I never was before. Not at all. It all started when I bought my new Mac. I got a free trial WoW CD in an issue of Maxim and decided I'd install it to see how well the graphics on the computer were. 28 days of game play later I can't bring myself to close the program.
Every time I want to get up and leave there's always one more quest to do, or one more guild member to help. I've been totally consumed by the game. I dream about upgrading leather armor or finding that elusive savory deviate delight recipe.
I wasn't the addict type. I used to go out to the bar, play softball, and date girls. Since I started playing WoW I haven't been on a single date. I took home a stripper once, but I can't really call that a date. Other than that, I haven't talked to a girl since I started playing. Come to think of it, I haven't masturbated either. My sexual urges are now satisfied by killing horde.
I haven't had my hair cut in about a month, but it doesn't matter since I haven't really gone out anywhere in public. Sure friends still call or stop by, but if I stop to answer the phone or the door I might get "ganked" while "AFK".
I now eat and drink at my computer. Breakfast is a cereal bar and diet soda that I grab on the way to the computer. Lunch mostly consists of Pizza, Chinese, Chicken, or wherever else will deliver - at least on the days I eat lunch. Dinnertime usually slips by unnoticed. It's amazing how quickly 2pm can turn into 2am.
I went to the fridge today to get another diet mountain dew, and there was a plate of pork chops in there. My parents must have stopped by. It must have snowed sometime within the last 3 days, because my porch is covered in snow - the only one on the block not shoveled. I only noticed when 4 neighborhood kids came by offering to do it for $5. I would have paid them to do it, but I haven't been to the ATM and don't have any cash at hand.
I still work from time to time - mostly on Tuesdays while I'm waiting for server maintenance to be done. Even then I come in early and work through lunch so I can be home by 2:30 when it's done. It's a great time to do quests in horde zones since the server is pretty empty. I'll probably be fired soon. I think they're just waiting until they see me in person so they can do it face to face.
I've got to go now though, some lower level horde are raiding a nearby town and I have to go teach them a lesson. For the Alliance!
Yours,
Xeido
Michael
